The swear words of the children

The swear words of the children

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"What have you said?" An upset mother asks her son who has just swore. Is this the best way to fight to prevent children from swearing? The independence that children are testing little by little induces them to test the limit of what is allowed. Saying tacos or swear words is an example of this.

A curse or taco usually arises when the child discovers and uses the power of language to express himself. Chronologically we can place this circumstance between 3 and 5 years of age, when the child goes to the "senior school". It is one more stage that some children go through.

This summer, I have reread the book by the psychologist Rosa Jové, Happy parenting, who is also the author of "Sleep without tears." In this manual, good advice is collected on what parents can do when faced with the swearing of our children, considering, of course, that each family places the child within the limits it considers acceptable, since the same words do not "offend" us all. Some of their recommendations are as follows:

1. Set an example. If you don't want your child to swear, don't say it yourself. Furthermore, what has been heard cannot be reproduced or imitated.

2. Avoid laughing or smiling at any swear word. As funny as an expression or some swear word may be, laughing at it is a mistake because it encourages the child to repeat it.

3. Explain simply and clearly that these words offend, they annoy, that they are not respectful and if they told him, he would not like to be treated that way either.

4. Keep calm and don't give it too much importance since an attitude in excess affected on the part of the adult can produce the opposite effect. That the child feels that tacos are not the best way to get the attention of their parents. The best thing is to redirect this stage naturally so that the curse words "lose their power" and their effect on the child.

5. Offer alternatives. Contribute other words to a feeling or situation in which the child is. Each family can adopt the words of its cultural and social environment that are most appropriate. Teach children, for example, that it is better to tell their brother that he is upset because you have broken his stroller, than to call him an "idiot" or a "donkey." Parents can come up with a fun new word to replace one of the offensive ones.

6. Offer readings to increase the child's vocabulary and make him discover new words, expressions, exclamations, ... more fun.

If the situation persists, perhaps the parents should assess other causes, for example, if they give enough attention to the child or if they are being too rigid with their education. And if you want to know more about the subject, I suggest you read this book.

In Happy parenting, from the La Esfera publishing house, you can also find all kinds of information on how to care for and understand your child from 0 to 6 years old: diet, sleep, tantrums, language, behaviors, and much more.

Vilma Medina. Director of our site

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